I'm sorry...

hey peoples...

i'm sry, normally i would least make some attempt to appear somewhat composed...
but here's the thing:
i feel like poop.
worse then poop.
more like cat poop. *shudders* that stuff is gross...trust me...

i'm nearing breaking point. (which, btw i've approached many a time) it might be all this worrying i've taken to doing, but more likely it's just the fact that i'm not so used to being happy as much as i have been. being happy is like second nature to most people, not so for me. for me it takes effort, most of the time i have to remember to be happy and try really hard to stay happy.

i apoligize in advance if i seem not all here for the next few days/week or so. (i'm hoping it'll only last that long this time around) that and the fact that i might seem a little rude/obnxious. really i am sorry, i'm normally a reletivly normal person but when i get like this it just make me so... so fragile. fragile in the sense that i really take everything extremely literally. i guess i do that on a regular basis, but during the next week or so i let it bother me like i shouldn't. i let things get to me and i tend to take them out on whoever is nearest. so if i get that way let me know, i dont like being that way. makes me feel like a fool afterwards... if this time is going to be as bad as i think it's gonna be i wont be at all pleasent for at least a couple days... perhaps it'll pass. probably not... so i'm sorry is all. really very sorry.

this happens to me every so often. if i'm lucky only once every few months.. don't be alarmed. it's sort of my version of coping with things, of sorting through gaint messes in my life. it used to be that i didnt even notice myself becoming like this. as i got older it was easier for me to recognize myself folding in. i'll be back to normal in no time. hopefully anyways...

i'll snap out of it soon enough.
snap out of it, or just snap.
hope for the first, the latter isn't so pretty.
not very much fun either...

<3 kitkat